gatty: (Default)
gatty ([personal profile] gatty) wrote2009-09-17 04:24 pm

(no subject)

Thank you to everyone who commented on my last entry. I was so horribly stressed out. I'm feeling better now, but I'm ill. Go me and my fail immune system.

I'm not that good at explaining Sophia to people, so I thought I'd just copypast the evil email, for entertainment's sake. I sort of don't want to be the only person who's read it. It's like a bad dream - if you tell people about it, it stops bothering you.

A little context: last summer I looked after my stepbrother, instead of taking a regular job near my home (they live over 2 hours away) on an awkward schedule with repeated cancellations meaning I had no idea how much money I was going to be able to save over the summer, and ended up having to rely on my overdraft. I took him out, we hung around and played games - I thought he might like some relaxed time as he is in school 8am-7pm all term time then shipped off to endless camps over the summer. No one said anything to me about there being a problem. This summer, I agreed again to do it (because I thought if I said no she would flip out on me for being selfish or something), and went down while still ill with swine flu, etc. Two/three weeks in advance, I had to cancel two days as I had forgotten I had sold out theatre tickets bought 6 months previously. Rude terse emails followed. To which I objected, because there's no need to be mean, or make other people feel like shit so you can feel better. That's called bullying and I'm having none of that. About a week later, my dad meets me for coffee, and tells me Sophia doesn't want anything to do with me anymore. I think the Evil Email fits in somewhere before that.

It does suit us better, Katherine.

for £60 per day from a nanny agency, I get:

reliability: I know they're going to show up, and manage their own complications, without involving me.

flexibility: if I need to cancel for any reason -- ill health or a change of plan, I do so without explanation or penalty (or resentment). If my times change because of work or trains or anything, they will remain and look after my son without any resentment or difficulty.

value: the person shows up on time (I don't need to wake them up), entertains my son (including catching the bus down the road and going somewhere), feeds him properly, organising lunch and dinner if necessary, cooks and cleans up, and I return home from work to a home cleaner and tidier than when I left it, and to a lad that hasn't spent all his days on the computer like he did last summer.

peace of mind: I can just go to work with an easy mind and come home, without having to walk on cracked eggs or deal with a load of mood.

Katherine, despite not being happy with your performance last summer, I agreed to give it another shot, for two reasons:

1. goodwill between us
2. we're in a recession; summer jobs and money is difficult to come by for university students especially

on the condition that:

your father explain to you (because if I criticise you you stop speaking to us for a year) that I expected you to carry your weight and do the job you were being paid for.

I suggest you get off your histrionic high horse, lose the high emotional drama and the attitude, and think about apologising to your father. You've really angered and hurt him this time. Stop behaving like a tedious, petulant 8-year-old. Take stock of the real (not fantasy) grown up world and consider joining it.

Have a good summer.


... God am I glad I am on the other side of the planet to her.

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